


Hermit

by SilverServerError



Category: CLAMP - Works, Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicle
Genre: First Love, Fluff, M/M, mild cw in the end note
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-29
Updated: 2018-11-08
Packaged: 2019-02-08 10:10:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12862329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverServerError/pseuds/SilverServerError
Summary: He’d spent so much time as a child in these woods. Wandering. Searching. Watching.This creature had a name, he’d learned a little later, still unknowing of the line between myth and reality.Fai.Fai who lived in the woods and granted wishes.Fai, the magician whose presence made him so sure that the fairies and the trolls and the monsters were real as well.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! A big thanks to lokapormusik on tumblr for the help when I ran into some writer's block with this one. Can't say enough how much fun the brainstorming was. ^^
> 
> Also, just to be clear, Kurogane is of age in this story. ^^ As always let me know if there's anything else I should be tagging for, but this seems like a pretty chill story.

  

He had always been there. The stranger in the woods. At first kurogane had thought him his own private discovery. The little cottage and wild garden, just like in all his fairy tales.

The ethereal creature that tended it, impossibly beautiful, even in simple shawls and shades of blue... Flowers woven into golden hair. A laugh like sunlight, faint from afar. Kurogane could spy for whole afternoons, always careful not to make a sound. Not to draw attention.

He’d spent so much time as a child in these woods. Wandering. Searching. Watching.

This creature had a name, he’d learned a little later, still unknowing of the line between myth and reality.

Fai.

Fai who lived in the woods and granted wishes.

Fai, the magician whose presence made him so sure that the fairies and the trolls and the monsters were real as well.

Kurogane’s grip on the blade shifted. He was supposed to be hunting. He was supposed to come straight home. But he’d forgotten any thought of pigs when he’d spotted him in the clearing. Unexpected, but always exciting.

In the meadow, the blonde spoke with a soft smile, as if the larks that followed him could understand. He wandered serenely, gathering flower after flower into a wooden basket.

Maybe it was bravery. Maybe he was hypnotized by the soft melody he sang. Maybe it was years of longing reaching their breaking point.

Fai was approaching. And kurogane let him.

“Oh,” Fai slowed, finally glimpsing him, wary of the dagger in his hand and the intense look in his eye.

For a moment, all Kurogane could do was stare. Fai had always seemed so otherworldly to him. To finally meet his eye… it was as if Kurogane had been taken there too. The same place, but different. Magical.

Belatedly he followed Fai’s gaze, and he carefully sheathed his blade, then held his hands out. No more weapons. Not a threat.

Fai eased, smile returning.

“Have you lost your way, young man?” He asked, voice warm and light and it felt so strange to finally be addressed by it.

Kurogane felt like he was in a trance. He didn’t resist when his first thought was, “I’m not a child.” Gentle indignation, then immediate embarrassment.

Fai just laughed, warm and good natured, a delicate eyebrow lifting as he looked over him a second time. “No,” he said, blue eyes catching on Kurogane’s shoulder and chest in a way that made his stomach pull tight and warm. “I suppose you’re not.”

Fai turned, continuing on his path home, but a lingering glance and a smile over his shoulder was invitation enough to have a spellbound Kurogane breathlessly following.

It took a long time to learn what Fai really was.

Sometimes it was whispered. Escape from this world. The feeding of an addiction. Entertainment for the bored.

Other times it was prayer. A last act of desperation when the healers had given up on you. Or you couldn’t let the doctors know what you’d done. At the very least he could ease the pain.

And other times still, it was almost a yell, drunken and slurred as voices bragged to each other over the rough hewn tables of the tavern. Kurogane remembered when he began to understand what these stories meant. How he’d listened with such a sick mixture of disgust and interest.

Kurogane knew Fai was all of these things. But what he believed… What he really believed in his heart of hearts, was the same thing he’d believed since he was a child.

Fai was magic.

Their footsteps crunched softly along the forest floor, lost in the sound of birdsong, unseen running water, and their own breathing.

“My name is Fai,” he said after a time. “And you must be a Suwa.”

Kurogane looked to him, suspicious. “How do you know?”

Fai just smiled, gazing at him for a moment before turning ahead. “You’re the spitting image of your father.”

“Kurogane,” he said softly, looking ahead with a slightly furrowed brow. How did he…? His parents had never spoken of… “My name is Kurogane.”

Fai glanced over at him, smile soft and warm. “It is good to meet you, Kurogane.”

Kurogane couldn’t make himself stop staring. The light catching his hair… The blue of his eyes…

“Did you come here looking for me?”

“No.” Technically, it wasn’t a lie this time.

Fai nodded, relaxing a little, moving the basket to one hand and letting it swing at his side. “Then this isn’t a business visit.”

The murmur of a stream. A breeze making the dappled sunlight dance across their path. Cool, gentle air, just enough to make goosebumps rise up on the back of Kurogane’s neck.

“And what is your business?”

“That depends on what people want from me.” Fai smiled, like that was some wonderful joke.

After that they didn’t speak much. Or rather, they did, but about nothing important. Commenting on the birdsong. Stories from the Winter. Stopping and changing course to give a skittish fawn and her mother distance.

If there was a set path to Fai’s cottage, Kurogane couldn’t pick it out, and for all the times he’d been there to spy, he didn’t realize how close they’d gotten until he followed Fai under a low limb and suddenly he was standing in the garden.

He recognized a few of the plants, now that he was close enough to see them. Some were staple foods of the region. Some his mother had warned were dangerous. Others still seemed to just be pretty.

But he didn’t have long to explore.

“Join me for tea?” Fai invited, holding the wooden door open.

Kurogane followed, quiet and curious. He had to duck his head to fit through Fai’s doorway, but once he was inside it was comfortable enough. It was small, but cozy. Well lit with a pleasant breeze once Fai opened a back window.

There was a stove. A small circular table with sturdy benches on four sides. A simple but well mattressed bed in the corner. And everywhere, things.

Books and potted plants. Flowers hanging from the rafters. Beautiful stones catching light along the window sill.

There was a soft meow from above and Kurogane turned just in time to see a white cat hop down to the table, then the floor to investigate his ankles.

“Aww,” Fai said, laughing as he set down his basket and folded his shawl to lay it on the bed. “Mokona likes you.”

Kurogane looked down, then hesitantly held out a hand. He was sniffed, investigated with pink-red eyes, and then ignored in favor of wandering out the door.

Kurogane watched her go as Fai returned with a smile in his voice. “Try not to be offended. She’s just very busy, you know.”

“None taken,” he said a little awkwardly, not sure if Fai was teasing or not.

“Please, take a seat. Relax.”

Kurogane settled on the far side of the table, watching Fai as he fussed with a kettle.

Some of the less kind of the villagers claimed that Fai was a witch. Kurogane knew, especially with his mother acting as priestess, that this was an insult. Why it should be an insult, he’d never been able to quite pin down.

“Honey?”

“What?” Kurogane asked, knocked out of his thoughts by the sudden term of endearment.

“Do you take honey with your tea?”

“Oh. Um, no. No thank you.”

Fai made a doubtful little face, but nodded all the same, turning back to the stove. He watched as Fai searched a shelf, long fingers flourishing gracefully as he took pinches from various dried bouquets, then crushed them into two mugs.

Kurogane didn’t know what a witch’s house should look like, but somehow he was growing suspicious this was it. He thought about it hard enough that there was just enough doubt to make him hesitate when Fai joined him at the table and offered him his drink.

Fai took a sip of his own, then smiled when Kurogane didn’t, gracefully not getting offended when Kurogane was reasonably sure he had every right to.

“Is this…?” Kurogane asked hesitantly.

“Not poison, I assure you,” he said with a slightly awkward smile.

“And it’s not…”

Fai just waited, raising an eyebrow with slight trepidation.

“It won’t… make me feel things.”

“Ah,” Fai said, smile growing a little sad. “Of course not.” He met his eye earnestly. “I would never do something like that unless the person asked me to.”

Kurogane nodded, wanting to drink, but still…

“Kuro?” Fai asked.

Kurogane looked up, about to correct him about his name, but getting distracted by the look on Fai’s face.

“I mean it,” Fai promised him. “And if it makes you feel any better,” he smiled a little ruefully, “that’s really not the type of thing I can afford to give away for free.”

Kurogane nodded, and though there were the echoes of a dozen villagers warning against it, he decided to trust Fai’s smile.

He drank. And felt fine.

Well, better than fine.

“This smells so good,” he smiled, setting it back down.

“Good!” Fai beamed at him, and his stomach did a little flip. “I was worried it might be too bitter without honey, but I’m glad you like it.”

“It’s different than what I’m used to, but it’s interesting.”

Fai just smiled and they drank in comfortable silence. However, something kept catching on his mind. That’s really not the type of thing I can afford.

He understood. His mother tended the shrine. Of course he did. They were always open to serve whoever needed them, but when someone could afford to contribute and didn’t…

Well, it was hard not to remember those faces when Winter was cold and supplies were thin.

“I should buy something.”

“You really don’t need to worry about it.”

It wasn’t just the words that were an echo of his mother, but the polite look on his face as well.

“No I mean it, I should…”

He dipped a hand into the bag at his side and grimaced even as he found the bits of metal.

Kurogane pulled the hand free, embarrassed by how few coins lay in his palm. “I’m sorry. I…” he hadn’t brought anything. Hadn’t expected anything but a simple hunt. He started to pull his hand back, wanting to forget the whole thing, but Fai reached out to hold it, the back of Kurogane’s hand held in the palms of Fai’s.

Kurogane gasped. If seeing Fai was… _touching_ him was... 

Fai’s hands were cool against his skin. His heart started to pound as Fai carefully leaned in and pushed the coins with his thumbs until they spread across his palm, counting with a soft concentration. “Fifty… Eighty… A five and a five…” Fai’s thumb gently tapped every single piece counting across his palm. “... Ninety-nine… One hundred.”

Kurogane burned with embarrassment. Even all together it was just one copper piece. It was nothing.

He tried weakly to pull away again, but Fai held him steady, thumbs starting to trace minute, idle circles against his palm as he looked around his cottage, considering.

“One copper,” Fai said softly, thinking out loud. “What do I have for one copper?”

“You already gave me tea,” Kurogane pointed out. That was easily already too much for such a small sum.

Fai still hadn’t let go of his hand.

“Hush,” he smiled. “That was just hospitality. You’re a guest in my home.”

Kurogane swallowed, mind blank beyond the contact.

“Hmmm… I could write you a small charm,” the fingers started circling again, slower this time. A massage that made his whole arm feel like it was tingling. “Or trade you for a fruit from the garden.” His fingers were so long, smooth and elegant. They felt good. “Or if you’d like, I think one copper would be just enough for a kiss.”

Kurogane’s eyes shot up, wide and mouth softly agape. He watched as Fai gasped softly, then slowly smiled, that same heat and interest from before making Kurogane’s stomach twist. Fai said nothing, but met his eye, and with intention, closed his hands around Kurogane’s pulling away with the coins, and then set them on his table with the soft chime of thin metal on wood.

A payment accepted.

Fai finally let his hand go and rose to come closer, joining him on the same side of the table. Kurogane twisted to meet him as Fai sat at his side, knees facing the opposite direction, thigh touching to hip and hip touching to thigh as they shared the small bench.

He felt so warm. His heart beat so hard.

“Yes?” Fai asked softly.

Kurogane swallowed, then gave a tiny nod.

Fai smiled at him, gaze half lidded and following lithe fingers as they traced Kurogane’s shoulder… his collar bone…

His neck…

His jaw…

Kurogane groaned softly, giving him room, shyly pressing into the touches. He was so distracted he barely noticed the telling way he felt his pulse between his legs.

Fai hummed with soft want, biting his own bottom lip gently.

“Have you ever been kissed before?” He asked Kurogane softly.

Kurogane didn’t answer. Even so, he could feel the bridge of his nose getting hot.

“It’s okay if you haven’t,” Fai told him, back of the knuckles starting to stroke his cheek.

How was Fai this perfect? How did so little feel so good? How could skin be so smooth or eyes so blue?

Kurogane felt the pressure growing against his pants and couldn’t even bring himself to care.

Fai’s thumb shifted to worry at Kurogane’s bottom lip, gentle and slow. Kurogane let his eyes close, sensation overwhelming and making arousal drip down his spine.

Then the thumb was gone, replaced by the soft press of Fai’s lips.

For long moments that was all. Breathing. Feeling the the gentle pressure. The closeness. It was perfect. It was everything he’d dreamed a kiss with his childhood fantasy would be.

His heart beat, and his body throbbed, and yet everything was still and silent.

Then…

After a blissful age…

Kurogane started to move.

Slowly and gently pressing his lips again. Fitting them against Fai. A subtly different angle. A new and glorious feeling.

And then Fai was kissing back, and their mouths never stopped moving.

“Mmm…”

The tease of a tongue. Warm and wet.

Fai’s hand found his neck, settling against his pounding pulse, and pulled him closer, tongue pushing inside.

“Ahhh!”

He opened his mouth, clumsy but wanting, thighs spreading as he rubbed his tongue against Fai’s.

Fai pulled back again, hand trailing down Kurogane’s side coming to rest high on his thigh. Comfortable, warm and wonderful, but not where wanted it. Not where the throbbed with every beat of his heart.

Kurogane breathed in sharply as Fai’s teeth caught on his lip. The tiny shock of pain had his toes curling and a hand helplessly grabbing the front of Fai’s tunic. Fai moved his hand again, and Kurogane missed it, until it settled on the side of Kurogane’s neck once more, fingertips teasing the short hair behind his ear, pulling him close as Fai started to suck at his throat.

“Mmm!”

Fai was breathing shallow, hot and wet against his skin. Sucking lower and broader and hard and-

“Wait!”

Fai stopped immediately, leaning his forehead against the side of his head, breathing softly and recovering together.

Kurogane whimpered as Fai started to trace long nails up and down his inner thigh, calming and enticing all at once.

“I was watching you,” he blurted, heart pounding. He didn’t know why he felt like he needed to say it, but he did.

“In the meadow,” Fai breathed against his ear, low and intimate. “I know.”

And it felt so good. Caressing against his ear. Fai’s lips. His breath. His words.

He pushed back with the hand at Fai’s chest, keeping him close, but needing to look him in the eye.

“No, I mean…” he swallowed, finally admitting the secret he’d carried as a constant companion. “I was watching you. Ever since I was a kid. I’ve been watching you.”

Kurogane wasn’t sure what he expected, looking up into Fai’s blue eyes as his stomach tied itself in knots. Anger? Fear? Disgust?

But he definitely didn’t anticipate Fai’s gentle smile, the way he licked his lips, or Fai’s fingertips caressing his scalp.

“Kurogane,” Fai murmured, soothing, like he was some kind of frightened animal Fai had met in the woods. “I _know_.”

  
Kurogane started calming down, breathing hard and searching his expression. “And you…?”

Fai just smiled, brushing his fingers across his temple and through his short hair. “It was harmless.” Fai kissed hairline sweetly. “And you were a cute kid.”

Kurogane glanced away, breathing softly, taking everything in. Fai started pressing warm, gentle kisses to his neck again, slow and reassuring. The teasing touch to his thigh became a whole palm, grounding and comforting.

“I’ve dreamed of this,” Kurogane said soft as a whisper, eyes tracing the far wall. “For a long time.” He caught the movement of the breeze through the curtains at the window. How the bouquets hanging from the ceiling to dry rustled softly. Unseen chimes filtered in from outside, their tones familiar, but so much clearer without the distance.

“And what did you dream?” Fai whispered softly against his ear.

 


	2. Rough Around the Edges

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little add on for Kurofai Week 2018. Prompt: Rough Around the Edges.

Most days, Fai woke to the sound of birdsong.

 

Calls that told him how the forest was faring for the day. How the night had gone. Everything he’d missed and everything he needed to know.

 

But there were other mornings. Mornings after nights before. Mornings where he slept through the forest sounds and awoke to the friendly ache of a hangover reminding him of the drinks he’d kissed from his young lover with the broad shoulders and burning eyes. Mornings that would start with Kurogane’s mouth and end in blissful panting before sending his beloved home once more.

 

This new third version… The version where he woke to unrhythmic sawing and curses just outside his window, was somewhat less romantic.

 

He wrapped a robe around his shoulders before moving outside to find Kurogane, back a broad expanse of shifting muscle as he drove a rusty old saw Fai had long since abandoned across the foot of one of his chairs. For a while Fai just let him work, fingers trailing through the sage that grew just outside the doorway, leaving that touch of fragrant oil behind as mokona wove between his feet. She meowed pitfully at him, but he knew full well his love would have already fed her and probably shared scraps of his own breakfast beside.

 

Kurogane was too concentrated- Making too much noise between the saw and the grumbled cursing- to notice he was being observed. When he finished on the leg, he set it upright once more, and with an expectant look, pushed at it gently from the side. The chair, as all Fai’s chairs did, wobbled.

 

Kurogane growled then kicked it over once more, swearing under his breath until his stalking brought his gaze back around to Fai before freezing.

 

“I didn’t see you there.”

 

“Good morning, Kuro.” Fai grinned, peering over a well muscled shoulder to the chair in the dirt. “I knew my chairs annoyed you, but I had no idea it was to such an extent as to call for revenge.”

 

“They don’t,” he huffed, crossing his arms and looking away. “I just…” He waved as if he could shoo away his tender words, even as he said them. “You should have nice chairs. Chairs that don’t teeter or give you splinters or catch on your clothing. You have the tools but you never use them.”

 

“A carpenter are you?”

 

Kurogane glanced back over his shoulder. “Clearly not.”

 

Fai smiled, pushing up on his bare toes to plant a chaste kiss on his cheek before moving past him, righting the chair. Kurogane moved to try and help, already apologizing for knocking it over, but Fai dismissed it, much more occupied with looking over the changes Kurogane had made and the little ovals of wood littered around his garden path.

 

“Well, now I have a slightly shorter chair. That's… something.”

 

Kurogane growled but didn’t lash out again. “I measured three times before every cut and still it somehow comes out uneven.”

 

“There is a reason people train for years and years.”

 

Kurogane sighed but didn’t press the subject.

 

“Do you want to know a secret, Kuro?” Fai put a finger to his mouth. “It wouldn’t have mattered. The floor is uneven too.”

 

Kurogane rolled his eyes, but accepted the stool for the lost cause it was. “Don’t you ever get tired of roughing it out here? People like you. You could afford nice things. A place in the village”

 

“ _Some_ people like me,” Fai told him as he straightened up once more, avoiding Kurogane’s increasingly penetrating gaze. “I could afford _some_ things.”

 

“Fai…”

 

But the blonde stopped short, and raised a hand for silence. “Do you hear that?”

 

Kurogane held his breath, straining to pick up some strange bird call or heavy movement. Try as he might, nothing significant seemed out of the ordinary. “What is it?”

 

Before Fai could answer, Mokona whined petulantly once more from the doorway.

 

Fai glanced back at her, then shared a silent laugh with Kurogane. “I believe it’s the sound of you letting me spend the rest of my morning in peace.”

**Author's Note:**

> (cw: Some themes of sex work and very brief, remembered, non explicit shaming of it.)
> 
> I'm a little on the fence if I should keep going or leave it there. So... let me know I guess if you'd like a chapter two? ^^' I hope you enjoyed it!


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